Keep the Big Ass Bows on the Trees, Please

South Carolina has some quirks that are beyond quirky. Rena, please forgive me for going here (Rena is a friend from Alaska who grew up in South Carolina, and lived in the town I currently call home. The quirkiness is, like, her normal, which is pretty disturbing to think about. I'm just saying.) Anyhow, here are just a few of the oddities we've encountered thus far:

• boiled peanuts (aka "bull penis") - Apparently these are best served hot, but they're served in the shell, so WTF? You have to take them out of the shell to eat them, so getting burned by the just-boiled peanuts is supposed to be a part of the joy of eating them?

• hair bows - This goes beyond cutesy little ribbons tied around ponytails, which are popular, too. Here I'm talking horrendously, obnoxiously huge, layered ribbons. They often are put on one side of a girl's head, making them look terribly unbalanced.

• debutantes - Not talking Debutaunt, but the tradition of "presenting" cute, mostly blonde, white girls in white dresses, to the world... The smack of caste system in effect, plus the degradation of these girls, is bothersome. I'm also left to wonder where their bows are.

• blue laws - You cannot buy alcohol anywhere on Sunday, even in restaurants. You cannot buy hard liquor after a certain time on other nights. You cannot buy many non-food items (including underwear) until after 1:30 on Sunday.

• sweet tea - I tried this once (in my life), at my husband's office Christmas party a couple weeks ago. It sucked. I don't get it.

• gifting stranger neighbors - As documented here.

Comments

[von Krankipantzen]

Ok, that underwear rule is totally weird. The other stuff is odd, but that rule takes the cake. Or pie.

[Mister Mrtl]

In the immortal words of a friend of mrtl who shall remain nameless, "who's wearing underwear?"

[Ern]

Dude, and I thought the Utah liquor laws were restrictive! (I'm so used to Cali now, it will be hard to ever go back.) And I would think that they would WANT you to be able to purchase coverings for your hoo-hoo, so you'd be decent on Sunday.

[kalki]

I will agree with you on all of these but one - I stand strongly in support of sweet tea.

[RzDrms]

(lovin' kalki's alliteration...once again.)

::ahem:: a girl often needs to buy undies well before 1:30pm on a Sunday...wazzup with that?! so she should go to Church with a big ol' bow and no panties? raunch.