mrtl: Enemasity

Enemasity

I have this imaginary friend with whom I IM on a fairly regular basis. Apparently I tend to initiate these sessions, as tonight she felt compelled to ask if I had any questions for her tonight when I hadn't IM'd her.

Each discussion we have is hysterically tangential, very rarely heading back to the primary topic of conversation, if there even was one. While I'd love to meet this imaginary friend, I have a feeling it would be a huge embarrassment, what with the cosmo's shooting out of my nose and the pained stomach from laughing. She's a barrel of hoots, she is.

She asks me to update my blog because she's bored. Since I'm having trouble coming up with something halfway entertaining, I'll instead go with a list of things I've learned about her, most in tonight's conversation.

She vacuums her kids.
She's never been to a passion party (my advice: go! she thinks because it'd be good fodder for blackmail, but it's more about the free cock ring)
She's very much like mister mrtl in that people often can't interpret if she's serious or joking. It's all in the delivery.
Her teenager uses her computer sometimes, so that first IM must be tentative.
Negative people make her want to cut herself.
Her old neighbor gave her kids enemas just to "clean them out."
She didn't know what a cock ring was.

The End.

Oh, yeah. Sorry, I titled this inappropriately. I was initially going to focus on the enema discussion we had, wherein she mistook my talk of colon cleansing as a desire to do an enema. You know, whenever I hear the word "enema," I am reminded of Pearls Before Swine. I love that comic.

Posted at 11:37 PM in Exposure | Permalink