Lookie Here! Ima Bloggin'!

This post is dedicated to my dear husband, who asked me to update the blogs. I'm only updating this one, though, because I'm lazy today. (I've spent all day watching the ANTM marathon. One more to go to see who won and go to bed! More on the stress brought by such a waste of time in a later post, if I get to it.)

Flashing back to Christmas. This year with the trip back East, I didn't get around to shopping till the week before. I had no idea what to get for the bugs.

::tangent for exception::
Last year Bug received this red car with a soft top. Pushing on the top made the car make vrooming noises. One day not long after Christmas, I was doing dishes as Bug was playing with her car. She left it on the floor behind me. I stepped back onto it, breaking it. "Mommy! You broke my red car! I loved my red car! Why'd you break my red car, Mommy?? WHY?!" After a week or so she got over it. Or so I thought.

Bug was eager to meet Santa this year. When I asked her what she was going to tell Santa she wanted, she replied, "Well, Mommy, remember my red car? The one I got for Christmas last year? The one you stepped on and broke? I'm going to tell Santa that I want a new one, but I don't want it to be red; I want it to be yellow instead."

When I later showed her about wishbones and she pulled the bigger piece, she told me she wished again for the new yellow car just like the red car I broke last year.

With as many times as she brought up this car, I was feeling some serious stress about Christmas shopping.
::end tangent for exception::

That's right. The real Santa was at our family's party. He's a close personal friend of my father's. I know you're jealous.

Having so much to do in so little time, I was starting to feel pretty stressed. As it was, Christmas cards didn't go out till a couple days after. Not that I'm giving myself a hard time about this; I hadn't sent out cards since 2004.

On the 20th I had a date to meet Hänni (another blogger met!) while the girls were in school. Weee! I got to AM's to learn that the Hänster was running late. By 2 1/2 hours (shopping, family, priorities, blah blah blah - lol). I decided to stay in town and try to get some shopping done. Imagine my glee when I found, buried behind several small red cars just like the one I broke last year, a small yellow truck that made big vrooming noises. Besides that I did the bulk of the shopping, including buying the materials to make Bug a Super Sleuth shirt. (I later recreated the logo in PhotoShop to print out onto an iron-on transfer. AWESOME!!!)

::tangent for introspection::
It's shit like this that really screws me up. I'm a guilt-ridden procrastinator. I'd like to change my ways, but when things just work out like this, I'm not moved to try so hard. GAH!
::end tangent for introspection::

All of the gifts were later hidden away in my closet, and I sequestered myself in there, bedroom and bathroom doors locked to keep Bug out in case she awoke and came down to visit. Over the next couple days I spent my evenings wrapping.

During the marathon wrap sessions, I became quite the lyricist. While posting this prior to the holiday may have added to the comedy of it, I'm still posting it tonight. It represents the frustration that inevitably comes when sequestered in a small closet, surrounded with toys, trash and wrapping detritus. It's sung to "Oh Tannenbaum."

Oh fucking tape! Oh fucking tape!
Where do you keep going?

Oh fucking tape! Oh fucking tape!
Your location I'm not knowing!

I looked under my leg for you.
First left, then right.
Under my ass, too.

Oh fucking tape! Oh fucking tape!
Where do you keep going?

"Tape" can easily be replaced with "pen," "gift tags," "ribbon," or "scissors." It's hella versitile like that.

Happy New Year!

This girl looks stoned in just about every picture I take of her.

Comments

[Susie]

hee! Love the where's the tape song. Your Christmas card is most delightful. I thought it arrived here after Christmas because it was addressed to my pseudonymous (how you like me now?) family name(s). I had to throw in the pen at some point on the Christmas cards. Just couldn't make it happen this year. Maybe I'll still send them out. Whatever.

Great score on the yellow truck.
(I think of your dear husband often, in a totally appropriate way, and wish and pray him home quickly.)

[~Kabe]

Happy Merry Christmas!

I'm sitting here with ANTM on and am such a procrastinator, too. This year's Christmas was pulled off because my friends at work let me tag along to their lunchtime surgical strikes.

Thinking of you!

[Ern]

Happy new year!

And those darn ANTM marathons are soooo dangerous for me. Even when I've seen them all before, I get sucked in. It's a sickness.

[mister mrtl]

Hello. I have no idea what ANTM is. Stupid tv, I'd wager. Anyway, thanks for the great post that reminds me how much I love and miss all my girls.

:-)

[Hänni]

Ha ha. You can write blogs and lyrics. Your song is a christmas classic and will be sung many a christmas year at hannihaus!

[von Krankipantzen]

I like your song. I'll sing it the next time I sew and lose the scissors, measuring tape, seam ripper or needle and thread. I'm usually sitting on them in the end. You'd think something sharp digging into my rear would tip me off.

Happy New Year!