Sobered and BC'd
Mister mrtl thinks I should take down my post from last night. He thinks I should be embarrassed by it. Like "What if your kids read this someday?" kind of embarrassed. I see his point, but I'm not embarrassed. Granted, I had a glass of wine too many, but nothing got broken. Besides, I don't make a habit of getting drunk (and wasn't trying last night - damn let down), and I did it in the privacy of my own home. My concern/regret comes from not being fully prepared to handle an emergency. All was well last night, and Jem slept till 3:30 so she didn't get a spiked meal.
So Bug and Jem, if you're reading this: As an adult of legal drinking age, don't drink without suitable and sober backup.
Let's move on, shall we? Today I got Mirena'd. Five years of birth control. After taking the pill for so long -- and luckily not getting pregnant, what with my frtlity and my propensity to forget things like taking a pill every day at the same time, -- it'll be nice to not have to worry or remember.
Oh, but there is some remembering involved. Every month I have to "check for my strings." Imagine the fun we can have with that phrase or suitable spinoffs! (e.g., "Hey baby, wanna check for my strings?")
Mister mrtl, if the kids read this one, chances are good that they won't be reading anymore.

String theory harmoniously unites quantum mechanics and general relativity, previously known as the Laws of the Large not fitting into the Laws of the Small, that are otherwise incompatible.
I can imagine it now...
xy: Any chance I'll get laid tonight?
xx: I'll see if I can pull some strings to get you in.
xx: What did you think of last night?
xy: Well the wind section left a lot to be desired, but the string section made my night!
******
We want to know if you have one of those String Cheese Incidents. And if you decide to play Cats in the Cradle - or make that contraption into a String Bikini, please post pictures here!
You know how to crochet now, no?
Posted by: Girl.A | 2006.04.28 at 02:49 PM
Yeah...this one would pretty much end the reading of mom's diary.
Us? We'll keep coming back for more, thank you.
Posted by: The Kept Woman | 2006.04.28 at 02:49 PM
Girl.A - I love you. Please remember that one should NOT pull the strings. Strumming is acceptable, though.
TKW - Especially if such phraseology is realized as veiled foreplay in their presence. ACK!
Posted by: mrtl | 2006.04.28 at 02:56 PM
I for one am glad you left the last post. Now I know just how easy it'll be for me to get you trashed so I can stick my hands down your pants.
Posted by: Hänni | 2006.04.28 at 05:26 PM
Hänni - As long as you dance DDR at the disco with me, love.
Posted by: mrtl | 2006.04.28 at 05:31 PM
Good GOD, woman.
BWAH!
Posted by: cat | 2006.04.28 at 05:50 PM
Cats in the cradle! HAH!
Posted by: amy | 2006.04.28 at 07:56 PM
I'm just sort of amazed that a mere two glasses of wine gets you sloshed! We are more or less the same size, too; you're a bit shorter, but I'm a bit lighter (not by much, though, and I didn't just have a baby!)
I'm funny with alcohol, though. Beer seems to get me tipsy faster than wine; wine just makes me really mellow. Is that weird?
And I can't say that I've ever been truly drunk...just the beer-tipsy I mentioned. I experimented one New Year's Eve, and I swear I had five glasses of this wine (it WAS a Chinese brand, maybe that was it? Though I did get a little buzzed), and nary a lampshade on my head.
Posted by: Andrea | 2006.04.28 at 09:16 PM
Half a glass of wine and I'm itching like hell and the hives swell up. White grape juice does the same thing. One of the lucky ones with allergy problems. I get a hangover after a dose of NyQuil.
Mirena could be cousins with a Diva Cup. Don't know that I'd want to be checking for the string all the time.
Girl.A sure knows how to liven up the place.
Pull some strings...LOL
Posted by: MrsDoF | 2006.04.28 at 11:06 PM
cat - Yeah - what's up with me these days?
amy? Totally lost with that one. Trying to remember the lyrics to figure it out... ?
Andrea - They were kind of full glasses of wine. At a restaurant it probably would have been four glasses. Anyway, it was yummy. Still wish I had some port wine cheese and Club crackers. The big ass bottle is still half full.
MrsDoF - Hives? Do margaritas do that to you, too, or is it just the grape products? Jelly? The Diva Cup - just the name makes me giggle.
Posted by: mrtl | 2006.04.29 at 01:00 AM
We recently had a lecture on BC in Pharm, and I SWEAR the Dr giving the lecture got an extra 50 bucks for every time he implanted one of those babies, because he WOULDN'T STOP TALKING ABOUT THEM. But on the bright side, your BC is very reliable.
Posted by: Ern | 2006.04.29 at 01:32 AM
Ern - Taking away the possibility for human error is genius.
Posted by: mrtl | 2006.04.29 at 02:16 AM
Hey Mrtl. String Check!
Posted by: William | 2006.04.29 at 03:25 PM
William - I don't know why, but that reminds me of Balls Out. lol A friend from high school played this with his frat brothers. They actually cut holes in the crotches of their jeans, so whenever someone called "Balls out!" well, that's what they did.
Boys are so stupid.
Posted by: mrtl | 2006.04.29 at 06:36 PM
IUD = Good! IUD perforating the wall of the uterus = not-so-good. So I only got to have mine for 3 years. *sigh* But it was great while it lasted!! Good luck with yours, and enjoy the frequent string checks!
Posted by: eclectic | 2006.04.30 at 12:10 AM
Well, my allergies seem to pick and choose what is going to bother me. Maybe they team up with something else. Not all things of grapes cause itching, but I tend to avoid them anyway.
I can't say I have a full on allergy to peanuts, but when I eat them, the eczema across my cheeks flares up. Not a nice day to have my driver's license picture taken.
I haven't had a margarita since the day after my 21st birthday, so I don't remember. After watching what alcoholism did to my dad and uncle, booze lost its appeal ages ago.
Posted by: MrsDoF | 2006.05.01 at 09:24 AM