Big Mouths and Other Stupid People

I'd like to start this entry by issuing an official apology to mister mrtl for slipping that the Redskins lost today. I didn't realize that he was watching that game at all, so didn't realize that he hadn't finished watching it. This is a major infraction. On his crappy schedule, he must resort to recording the games he wants to watch and becomes obsessively avoidant of news, sports channels, and big mouths. This I knew [but it was the Redskins, and I didn't know the season had dwindled down to so few games]. Typically if he hears the final outcome, he won't bother finishing the game. I feel horrible about this, and promise to not initiate any talk of sports EVER again.

----

::tangent before the story::
Quick item of interest: The salon gift certificate I received at the baby shower came with a list of their services. See what's included?

First off, OUCH! Second, I'm curious to know the difference in pain ratios between having one's nostrils waxed by a common esthetician and a senior esthetician. And what else would that Jackson get me? Less Rudolph? Fewer ingrown hairs? A kiss afterwards to make it all better?
::end tangent before the story::

The last two days have been dull. D.U.L.L. I've started knitting a blanket. I've done a bit of work. I'm slowly catching up on reading blogs, but too much sitting and staring makes me tired, which is kinda hard to sneak in (of any quality at least) while Bug is home with me.

Considering my modified bed rest routine includes walking up and down stairs and sitting down, I didn't see any danger in going out to dinner tonight. Mister mrtl was able to take off tonight and tomorrow, making it possible to go without having to lift Bug in and out of the truck. We headed to a local restaurant.

I was so annoyed at this restaurant, specifically at the manner in which the staff excluded Bug. I told the lady who seated us (who ended up being our waitress as well) that we were a party of three, yet she only grabbed two menus, failed to set a third place setting and to provide a glass of water for Bug, and gave us only two plates with the complimentary hot rolls. Why should we have to ask that she be recognized? At one point she came to the table while I was midsentence talking to Bug; she thought I was talking to her (though I wasn't looking at her) and interrupted Bug's response to me. WTF? I was thinking that she may not be a parent, but when she got so terribly friendly with Bug (after not acknowledging her the entire time we were there thus far) -- as mister mrtl was filling out the credit card receipt, an obvious attempt at getting a bigger tip that didn't work, -- she mentioned her kids. Stupid wench.

This post is continued on Bug's site.

~*~*~*~

Yesterday on "Martha"

I'm still wondering about this strange fascination that Martha has with David Letterman. In yesterday's episode, she was wearing an apron adorned with his head. I've watched Letterman a few times recently, and he's not mentioned her once. She, however, talks A LOT about him EVERY day.

As for the quote of the day, this just sounded weird to me. I'm sure she didn't mean it tongue-in-cheek.

::Referring to apron:: Dave, look how cute you look!

::Referring to an invite to his show on February 2:: I really wanna do a great job over there. I don't wanna be tired for Dave. Would you go on him? Would you go on him being exhausted after a whole weekend of shooting in Italy?... They're very inflexible over at the Letterman Show. Oh my God. He has to work on his flexibility. Paul Shaffer is much more flexible, but that's probably because he's a musician.

Comments

[Bente]

That was so not cool of that waitress at all. Poor little Bug. I'm hoping she didn't pick up on too much of the rudeness.

[William]

Servers should know the happier they keep the kid the better the tip.

On Letterman he said something about Martha.
Letterman mentioned getting cake from her every day and how he did not like cake that much.

[Hänni]

That waitress must be a horrible mother. She was entirely rude.

I can't wait for your recount of the David Letterman/Martha show in a few weeks. I'm sure there'll be *plenty* inuendos in that one.

[Kylz]

Ok, I am still stuck on the nostril waxing. How would they do that?!

No, wait, I don't want to know.

[Jana]

That was a very funny post, even though there was a rude waitress involved. I enjoy getting to know Martha via mrtl!

[suburban misfit]

Oh, lordy, she's going on Letterman! Oh, the innuendoes (is there a second "e" in that word?)

And the cuteness of Bug always just makes me smile, smile, smile!

[Susie]

That used to annoy me tremendously, when waitstaff would "dis" little LG. We've had that with the no plates, no water, no utensils. We've been led to tables that were clearly meant for two, and had a high-chair stuck on the corner. Um, NO. I always called them on it. If children were treated more like people in restaurants, they might act more like people. Maybe part of their bad behavior (not Bug's or LG's, of course), is that they are feeling disenfranchised!

[mrtl]

Bente - I think she did. When the waitress got all nice with her at the end, Bug played coy. She's usually very talkative.
William - Word. She could have handled us so much better.

That's funny about the cakes. Last week was cake week, and they sent one over every day.
Hänni - I'm with you on that (that she must be a horrible mother). I mean, who talks to their kids, anyway? And why would kids need table settings and drinks?

I'll be sure to record that Letterman for a recap.
Kylz - Thanks for stopping by! I don't think I want to know that either. I'm opposed to nostril waxing on principle alone. Nostril hair has a purpose; why would anyone want to be rid of it? (I wonder too how far up they go. UGH!)
Jana - Thank you, dear!
misfit - It sounds like Letterman makes her the butt of his jokes (which don't sound very nice at all), and she's trying to woo him. It's all too reminiscent of a middle school crush. Kind of pathetic if you ask me.
Susie - I know. Last night was the first time it was really horrible. Usually the issue is that they put really hot plates or open cups right in front of her, which we forgive as ignorance. Last night was egregious.

[Dima]

If I were a waitress and a family came in with a child, I would probably do the opposite. I would pay attention only to the kid and tell the people to serve themselves while I played with their kid. Especially one as CUTE as Bug!
It's ok though, to bitches, children are invisible!
Martha is a Letterman-love-slave wannabe! EW!

[mrtl]

Dima - Oh, the mental image I got reading that love slave business is so wrong. It's going to take a while to get that one out of my head.

[MrsDoF]

How could the waitress ignore such a cutie girl!
The way I usually handled a family was to have kiddie stuff in my hand, then ask the parent if I should give it to the child.
Even before I had children of my own. It must be a people instinct. If the waitress has children, and she ignores them as well, oh what a sorry situation.

Nose hair is a problem. Especially after age 45, and lady hormones are going away.
Consider yerself warned. Being pregnant and menopause are a world apart.

[sheryl]

I'm thinking this is another reason I am glad I am not a server at a restaurant. I would not have any idea how to be great at it. It would take a lot of question asking and practice, I guess.

Also, I am thinking about my mother's nose hair. I do not want her nose hair when I get older. Maybe I won't get it. We didn't have the same leg hair or facial hair (she has it, I don't). Then again, she has zero stretch marks and I have some from way back when I was busty and twelve. I can only imagine after having a babe. (Making note to self to ask man to sign a contract not to leave me after my body turns into a sack of stretch marks.)

ok, that sounded worse than I meant it.

Lastly, my boss has a crush on Martha Stewart. He has a crush on Lindsay Lohan, too, and several other people that look/act nothing alike. But! Here's the good part: I will send you a picture of his PC monitor at work. He cut out a picture of Martha Stewart and he kisses her (by kissing his finger and pressing it against the picture) every time I bring it up.

[mrtl]

Mrs DoF - Are you talking about nose hair on the outside of the nose, or billowing forth from the nostrils? I could understand waxing the outside (and it sounds a lot less painful), but I'm a firm believer that a nose hair trimmer would be sufficient to tame the beast within.
sheryl - We're not asking for a whole lot, just that her presence is acknowledged (well, there's more, especially after the experience we had last night).

I have stretch marks from overnight boob growth, too. Those look worse than my baby stretch marks.

A cutout? Just of Martha, or all of his "ladies"? Oh the weirdness!

[MrsDoF]

Growing inside, peeking out (so far no billowing). Many more hairs than necessary for their intended duty of keeping the sinueses clear.
I also have eyebrows for the first time in my life.
It has been 64 days since I had to use my Diva cup.

Sheryl, there was a neighbor on my street when I was growing up who had a little statue of the Virgin Mary on the dashboard of his car. Every time he would put the key in the lock, then kiss the tips of his fingers and touch the Lady, then reach back and start the car. I hadn't thought about that in years. Life is the same thing over and over.

[Torrie]

I know a few people who could use a good nostril waxing.

[lawbrat]

The restaurant thing annoys me to no end. I took the boys out last summer. Brennen ordered the tamales- hot. The server asked ME, does he really want the tamales? WTF? I said, isnt that what he just said?

[little sister]

Maybe the soul of Colleen Nestler has taken over Martha???

Obviously that rude beyotch server flunked server school! When I waited tables, I even pandered politely to the little hellions who demanded shirley temples without even saying please (that's the parents' fault, anyway), so a cutie-pie like Bug would have had me all about your kid - bringing her own bread and everything!

[eclectic]

Mrtl, you crack me UP!!!!!

[Nina]

Shameful on ignoring Bug . . . that amazes me. I can say we never had that happen and I would have been tick if we did.
The nose hair waxing I have never heard of, and I don't think so ... they would never get near my nose.

[wordgirl]

Waxing nostril hair sounds like Medievel torture. I don't get Martha's feeling that Dave is inflexible. Isn't that sort of her hallmark? I mean, before prison?

[sheryl]

Hey, Torrie made me think of something. Waxing various parts of the body would be perfect torture, I think. Especially nostrils. And some other parts I won't name.

mrtl, I'm sure you don't ask that much of a server... just that I'd likely be a tad clueless in some areas. I take care of my nieces and other kids, but I sort of do things my own way - definitely not the way my sister would. I don't care if they wear pajamas to school (if they refuse to get dressed). She's way more controlling than I am, which I know is necessary in many ways when you have four kids and two of them are four (and one of the four year olds came to their family complete with major behavioral problems).

Sometimes I'm just a little clumsy and unaware of the kinds of things that people who take care of kids everyday just somehow *know*. And I am the kind of person, in my job anyway, where I like to approach situations with a mind to set others at ease, knowing what to do and what to listen and look for. I probably will never be a waitress so I have time to learn. But now that I sadid that, you never know.

[sheryl]

LOL wordgirl and I were both writing about nose hair waxing as torture at the same time.

[mrtl]

MrsDoF - HAHAHAHAHA! The Diva Cup! I thought that was a joke for the longest time; the name still makes me laugh.

I'm not convinced that waxing the nostrils is necessary. Then again, I've never actually tried a nose hair trimmer.
Torrie - You think it hurts more than a Brazilian? I'm thinking it would. Gah!
lawbrat - Kids don't get no respect. If the parent is letting the kid order, the kid's old enough to decide. That shit just pisses me off.
little sister - ::smooch::
eclectic - :)
Nina - You lucked out with the kids. I wouldn't let them near my nose either.
wordgirl - She's all high and mighty now that she's gotten her pole turned (the one up her ass, that is). I can't say it's been completely removed.
sheryl - Much of it is common sense. Three bodies = three place settings. It's par for the course that we have to remind wait staff to include things for Bug. I'm not expecting non-kid likers to get all friendly (although that's wise if one wants a great tip). You're a considerate woman, so I'm sure you'd be a wonderful waitress.

The jammies to school thing? I'd have to side with your sister, but that's because I'm the mommy. Cool aunts can get away with that.

[MrsDoF]

I'll have you know that I made a convert or two or three with that Diva Cup.

Doris at Gran's on Bran bought one for herself and her daughter for Christmas! Within this post of hers is a link back to my blog in November. I can't believe it was that long ago.

And then she gave a href="http://grans-on-bran.blogspot.com/2005/12/mooncup-review.html">great review with Nurse's Notes type details (with your queasy stomach, you might want to skip this second link).

[MrsDoF]

Doggone It! One little keystroke!

great review

[Heathen]

I simply can't believe the cost of waxing up there!!! (and here I thought Los Angeles was expensive). I pay $40 total (including tip) to wax and tint my brows and to rip off that mustache I've started growing since I turned 30.

[mrtl]

MrsDoF - Will skip the second. Thanks for the warning. :)
Heathen - These prices seem too much to me, too. I haven't had my brows done since I left Texas ($6 there), but doubt my hair stylist here in town would charge as much as this place. It's a frou frou establishment, though.