Won

Why was this topic chosen this week? Because I'm bitter. Bitter over Blingo. Left and right, blogger friends are winning, winning winning, over and over again, but not me. Why?

It's curious that what comes to mind is the summer of '85. That June, the family had just returned to the states from a three-year tour in Japan. I hadn't been in touch with many of my old friends...

::tangent::
There's something about hearing a story from your mother, who heard it from your best friend's mother, about your best friend raping a frozen hot dog, only to have it break off while still inside, and she couldn't remove it, so she had her mother (the same one who told your mother) help her out with some hot dog tongs (what? she was a nurse and obviously knew what she was doing)...

::tangent within a tangent::
WHAT THE FUCK was up with her mother telling anyone else about it???? I mean, isn't the whole incident mortifying enough? And cold? Damn, y'all, my cooter would be fah-reezing! Don't try this at home, folks!
::end tangent within a tangent::

...that makes one not so keen on rekindling the friendship after a few years in another country, especially when one is about to start at a new high school, knowing no one really well except "the girl who's mom extracted a frozen hot dog out of her cooter with hot dog tongs" (you better believe that everyone knew).
::end tangent::

Yeah, so where was I? Ok. That summer, I spent the majority of my time in my room listening to the radio (during which time Raspberry Beret got wwwwwwaaaaaaayyyyyy too much airplay) and making my own luck.

Hear me? I made my own luck. Stupid radio contests? Tell me you want the tenth caller, baby. It didn't matter what the prize was, I was all over it. I was the Mad Dialer, and probably had callouses on my fingers to prove it. I can't remember all I won, but I know it included vinyls of Van Halen's OU812 and Frankie Goes to Hollywood. I vaguely remember some movie premiere in some out-of-the-way town, too.

Making the connection? I am HIGHLY suspicious that some of these Blingo wins are the direct result of Mad Searching. Am I right? Do tell! Do you search just to search?

Or don't tell. I know I've only been using Blingo when I have something in particular that I need to find. So far no wins. Maybe if I were to make a more concentrated effort to win, I could do it...

Let's see what happens this week, during Operation Win at Blingo (OWaB).

next week's topic: first kiss

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Did you write? Let me know!

Cat, Hänni, Jana

Comments

[spoonleg]

Freaking sick. I am SO totally down with the first kiss gossip.

[Susie]

Brrrrrr.

I'll write tonight, probably.

[yonzie]

I was going to tell you that I haven't won anything in two months, so it should make you feel better, but then I read about the pussy dog and barfed all over my keyboard.

[william]

I thought the the story of a the broken Ball Park Frank (they plump when you cook them) was an Urban legend. Are you saying it is true?

[Amy]

Yeah I always thought that was an untrue totally true story too. Like the peanut butter/dog thing. But if HER MOTHER was telling people, it had to be for reals! Yikes! Frozen Cooteritas!

[jana]

yeah that is really crazy, cuz there was a girl in my high school that we called "Hot Dog" for this very reason. But if her mom was telling it, it had to be true. Maybe the girls were related, and they both dared each other to do it.

Either way, Hot Dog stole my boyfriend freshman year, bitch.

I will write my genius piece of 'won' later on, say, noonish??!?!?

[jana]

oh and Amy? Frozen cooteritas is officially the phrase of the day. Fabulous.

[Torrie]

I never win on Blingo either!!!!

[eclectic]

Frozen cooteritas! Bwhahahahahahahha!!! Mrtl, your high school had to be just ever-so-much more entertaining than mine.....!

[Dima]

This is the way I look at it: if a hot dog were "real" it wouldn't be very satisfying, so why even use a hot dog. If you're into meats packaged in intestine-like casing, go for the Italian Sausage, to at least have a moment of pleasure before you call mommy to retrieve said meat, certainly something you wouldn't get from a hot dog. Maybe back then hot dogs were made in a larger size, but surely today's hot dogs ain't worth it!

[cheryl]

Ooooo--that's just gross. And her mom TOLD?? I can't imagine.

[Nina]

3 degrees . . . Really???? I can tell you that Eagle River Alaska is not the place for me.

[kalki]

Yeah, what yonzie said, both about not having won for 2 months and being completely disturbed by the hot dog. I will say that I won while doing legitimate searches. So there.

Oh, I cannot wait for first kiss!!

[The Anti-Stalker]

Check out the Snopes link. I call B.S.

And yes, it was -3 this morning!

[The Anti-Stalker]

http://www.snopes.com/college/risque/hotdog.asp

[mrtl]

Spoonleg - Word.
Susie - Gives you the chills, doesn't it?
yonzie - That doesn't make me feel any better. Sorry you barfed.
william - That was a running joke around it, but IT WASN'T COOKED!
Amy - You crack me up! I didn't know it was an urban legend. I suppose such a thing isn't too far fetched to happen otherwise.

I would hope that the girl's mother wouldn't try to spread such a story about her daughter.
jana - Oh poor girl, going through high school with that nickname.

I'm with you on the frozen cooteritas.
Torrie - I feel like such a loser.
eclectic - This supposedly happened around 5th grade. I'm not sure how high school was for her; we had no classes together (and I transferred out that December when we moved to a new neighborhood).
Dima - SHE WAS 10 YEARS OLD!
cheryl - I know. The horror of it!
Nina - It's pretty damned cold.
kalki - Your "confession" doesn't make me feel any better, you lucky boogerhead.

[mrtl]

T A-S - Honey! You bring a tear to my eye when we're so on the same page (I linked to that same site just now). ::smooches::

Maybe when Mom is out for Thanksgiving you can chat with her about this. Surely she'd remember (she remembers everything, you know), and it wouldn't be totally out of character to have such talk at the dinner table. (Except my brother won't be here, so we'll be devoid of the requisite burping, farting, and condom talk.)

[Mama Duck]

Oh. My. God.

Would someone PLEASE remove this rather large rock that I have apparently been living under for the last million years!?!?

(I have NO idea what Blingo is...must look into it straight away)

[Dima]

Ok, EW! I did not know that the aforementioned pervert, daughter of a pervert, was only 10 years old. I didn't even know what a vagina was when I was 10, let alone trying to stick something in it. GROSS! What is wrong with her mother too?

[RazDreams]

okay, i keep logging on here to see if naked hotdog loving naked tong chic with the naked hotdog make-me-throw-up chic story was moved lower down and there was some happy shiny story about virginal virgins and non-naked-hotdogs. but NO! still sex with hotdogs! gag!

[mrtl]

Mama Duck - BE MY BLINGO FRIEND! I sent you a link.
Dima - She had an older sister, so she knew.
Raz - Sorry. Inspiration hasn't struck for an update just yet. Maybe later. (Isn't that what Bloglines is for?)

[Dima]

I just signed up for Blingo, but I don't have any Blingo friends :(

[RazDreams]

what in the world is bloglines?! seriously?! and i really do do this for a living! (i said dodo! heeheehee!)

[RazDreams]

okay. i got about two clicks into blingo'ing "bloglines," and it all sounded way too techno-goo-roo for this chic that does internet cr@pola all day long every day with the internet stuff all day for the paycheck. all day. seriously. even figuring out the new digital camera afterhours requires discipline and order and wine. and whine.

[Momo]

So nasty! And people wonder where the women of today learned to gossip...from our mothers, of course! That's just wrong.

Mrtl, I've never won either. That isn't cool, it is soooo totally our turn.

[Von Krankipantzen]

It can't be real. It can't have happened. NO WAY!

[Von Krankipantzen]

Oh yeah! Canadians cannot play Blingo. So mean.

[Sharkey]

Add me to the loser list--I've never won at Blingo either. And the hot dog topic has pretty much been beaten to death, so I think I'll leave that one alone.

[mrtl]

Dima - mwa hahaha! Welcome to my harem!
Raz - You sign up, enter the websites you read regularly, and it will tell you when someone has updated when you sign in.

Be strong.
Momo - It is wrong.
Kranki - Mister mrtl is a doubter, too.
Sharkey - You know, it'd be easier to win, I'm sure, if I were actually signed in. gah.

[RazDreams]

well, expect your stats to go wayyy down once i sign up on that website for all the blogs i read. i won't have to hit your sites all the time anymore to see if you've updated with new goodies.

[Ern]

I haven't read all the comments, but I haven't ever won at Blingo either. (Bastards) I use it to find all the photos I link to in my bird posts, and THAT'S some mad searching. But maybe not enough.

[cat]

I freaking played! Yeah! I'm just a day late! Boo.

[mrtl]

Raz - That's ok. If it makes you a more efficient and happy blogger, it's all good.
Ern - Nah - You have something to search; it's not that you're making up things.
cat - Yay!

[Dima]

I still don't get it. How do I play? I signed up, I ran a search on it. I still don't have friends :(

[Hänni]

I'm so late on this one, but wanted to let you know, I played!

[mrtl]

Dima - Just search. If you win, a special screen will pop up. (See the "did I win?" link for info.)
Hänni - Yay!

[Kgrams]

I have never won either :(

[mrtl]

Kgrams - It's a darn shame that the winning is so contained.