The other day, Bug's Little People Farm moo'd at me whenever I walked across the playroom. Yes, it was moo'ing at me, as evidenced when mister mrtl (who is heavier than me by at least 25 pounds, even with the excess weight I've gained so far) walked across the room with nary a moo, peep or oink. It finally moo'd once at him, but just once. It got me every time. It's very hard to not take such things personally.
It was only for the day, though, so I thought maybe it was how I was walking that day. Maybe my pants made me walk differently? (Work with me, folks; it really bothered me that it happened at all.)
So today I was pretty bummed to discover that Bug had pulled the farm off the table, putting it on its side on the floor to be used as a makeshift stool. On its side, the door is trapped shut, making mooing impossible.
I can hear the moos in my head. They say, "Toooooooo much pie."
I'll tell you what my brother always tells me when I complain to him about my computer. "It is an inanimate object. It is not out to get you." I didn't say I believed him.
Posted by: Von Krankipantzen | 2005.10.24 at 11:55 PM
What a rude farm. Elli's hasn't had the nerve to try that with me yet, but I'll let you know if it happens.
Posted by: Bente | 2005.10.25 at 12:24 AM
You know it could just be catcalling like a construction worker :"You are mooooooooootiful, baby!"
Posted by: ScottyGee | 2005.10.25 at 06:20 AM
It was saying, "Help me! Help me!"
(the thing that the doctor uses to check ears/nose/throat: otoscope--that may not be spelled right, though)
Posted by: suburban misfit | 2005.10.25 at 07:58 AM
Take it from me - cows like to fuck with people.
Posted by: kalki | 2005.10.25 at 08:06 AM
Okay, EEWW. I just realized my last comment could be taken an ENTIRELY different way than I meant it, and so now I have to do preventative damage control.
Cows like to mess with people's heads.
There, better.
Posted by: kalki | 2005.10.25 at 08:07 AM
All I can think of is that old commercial, where the cows said (or sang, really), "Mooooove over, butter."
Posted by: LadyBug | 2005.10.25 at 08:33 AM
Cows like to fuck people - good one KSta.
That little farm would have found it's new home in the trash bin in no time. Fucker.
Posted by: ieatcrayonz | 2005.10.25 at 08:44 AM
WTF?? Now the Google ad is suggesting a "Moo Mixer" as a "Great Gift". The bovines are staging a coup! Gaaaaah!
Posted by: eclectic | 2005.10.25 at 10:49 AM
Kranki - Hard to believe when it wouldn't moo at the mister.
Bente - Slap it if it does!
ScottyGee - Now that's a great comment! You go!
misfit - Yeah? "Help me! A huge woman is going to step on me!" ? pbthththth!
kalki - You are the resident cow expert. I'll take your word for it. (BTW - "mess with people's head" may make people snicker, too.)
LadyBug - Like "Watch out! Thar she blows!"
yonz - It brings Bug way too much joy for that. Just this morning she was checking the cow's ears (with her new doctor's kit).
eclectic - Google is damn smart with the marketing!
Posted by: mrtl | 2005.10.25 at 12:27 PM
Those moos were saying moooooooore pie . . .
That is all, nothing else. . .
Posted by: Nina | 2005.10.25 at 01:58 PM
I think it's saying "moooooooooooore pie."
The mister doesn't need any ;-) well, maybe a little, since the farm mooed at him once :)
or else it's just a rude little farm that needs to be kicked in its dairy-air ;-)
Posted by: little sister | 2005.10.25 at 02:12 PM
No, no, no.
It was saying "Help me! I'm trapped in this barn and I NEED PIE!"
Posted by: suburban misfit | 2005.10.25 at 03:37 PM
Nina - I'm working on another theory. Stay tuned.
little sister - HA! I will kick it in your honor.
misfit - He can't have it. It's mine.
Posted by: mrtl | 2005.10.26 at 12:43 AM