A One Liner

I was asked in the comment section of my last post if the only reason why I bought a pregnancy test was because of a food craving. The answer to that is no. My stomach has been upside down for several days now, but I've attributed that to the medication I'm on for my throat. There have also been some issues with our current form of birth control, not only from my forgetfulness in taking it -- for several days in a row -- but also from not keeping up with taking it on time while in another time zone. That being said, even without these circumstances, I would have bought the test on the craving alone. While it's typical for me to be in the mood for something, I never feel so strongly about something that I must. stop. now. to get it, much less actually gotten up to go get it now (if it is indeed possible to much less than never).

The test was negative, but I'm not sure if I'm convinced. Good thing I got a Extra Value Pack with 2 3 tests in it. I'll wait a week or so and take another if I'm still feeling queasy after I'm off these meds. Of course, "or so" will put me in my parents' house, requiring me to smuggle the test in and smuggle any evidence of it out, or at least hide it until after I've shared results with mister mrtl.

We are planning to have another child eventually, maybe sooner than later. I'm not one to share the whole "we're trying" business, so don't expect some big announcement about that. (Egads! I can only imagine what the comments would be, between "Get it on, mrtls" and Pokey visiting to offer THIS.) Call it residual Catholic guilt if you want; I'm a prude and don't want to talk about it. Funny, I remember keeping a diary way back when, and wouldn't even talk about it there, when I was the only one reading it.

Oh, and for those of you who came looking for a one liner: As people get older, the puns get dumber. That's why they call them groan-ups.

Comments

[mamaramma]

Boy - we're riding on some parallel wave right now: Both of us moving in May (you from hot to cold, me from cold(ish) to hot), both of us living with residual Catholic guilt, both of us forgetting our BC (like guilty Catholic girls would), and both of us buying the extra value pregnancy tests and hoping our parents don't come across them. Mrtl, where have you been all my life???

[Sharkey]

Ugh . . . that pun was HORRIBLE! It did, indeed, make me groan.

You sound okay with the negative test, but you also sound like you're okay with the idea of a positive test next week. Whichever way it ends up, I hope it's what you want.

Get it on mrtls! Ahem . . . sorry--was that out loud?

[lawbrat]

Smuggling it in, evidence out....LMAO! That was funny. I can so relate. I'm sure you and Mr.mrtl dont need POKEY offering his THIS. I hope you get to feeling better.

[kalki]

Thank you for clearing that up for us. Inquiring minds wanted to know.

I'm like you, though - when it comes to babymaking, don't nobody need to know nothin'. Protect your privacy - I'm cool with that. And I hope your symptoms either disappear or start to make sense soon...

[Circus Kelli]

Tests -- The first one I took as 100% positive and I took it at home, in the privacy of our own bathroom.

When we were trying for our second, I had taken a test or two that came back negative. Then, while on the way to enjoy Thanksgiving dinner at my BIL/SIL's house, we stopped and picked one up. Test smuggled in, results smuggled out (wrapped in layers of plastic bag). It was in their bathroom that we discovered Sweet Pea was on the way.

For little clown number three, my cycle had been wacky since little clown number two was born (about nine months earlier thankyouverymuch), and my friend offered me the 'leftover' test from a two-pack she had purchased. I took the test in the bathroom stall at work -- 100% positive. We had planned on having another clown, but not so soon. I was in FREAK OUT CITY until Hubby told me he thought it was hilarious and 'talked me down'.

mrtl -- even though you inflicted that horrible pun on us, I still wish you the very best in which ever direction you life takes you.

[LadyBug]

One-liner. I just got it. Like, one line in the pregnancy test window.

Okay, so I'm a little slow this morning.

And now I'm wondering if your cravings may be stress-related? With the long-distance move coming up and everything. I tend to binge, er, I mean get cravings when I'm stressed out. Could that be it?

Anyway, thanks for sharing the news with us. It dawned on me yesterday afternoon that, just because you're willing to share so much of yourself online, doesn't mean we have the right to demand more info than you're willing to divulge. So I'm sorry I threatened to call you "Crazy Gnome Lady." Even if you are.

Hugs,
LadyBug

[suburban misfit]

We weren't planning on having kids AT ALL, so imagine my surprise when the routine pregnancy test for my annual PAP exam turned up positive! "Run it again." was all I could say.

(Actually, I had had a miscarriage a couple months before that--just thought I was having a really, really bad period--so it turns out I was very fertile.)

We were using just about every method of contraception imaginable when I concieved The Boy. He was meant to be. And, I had just had my wisdom teeth removed, and oh yeah, there was that huge barn kegger the week before...poor thing had to swim through the drugs (legal and prescribed) and the alcohol to find my uterus!

Good luck (for whichever outcome you'd like best) and I am totally with you on those damned chips. They're like crack.

[Spurious Plum]

May the Uterus Gods grant your every desire!

And crack chips? Where?

[kristine]

OMG...you said one liner.

I'm old.

[mrtl]

You all are funny. I'm glad I brought some drama and groans into your day. That didn't sound right.

No cravings today, but my stomach is still upside down and I'm having problems focusing on getting work done (hence the posting). Maybe it is stress-related, LadyBug. My fingernails are gone, too, afterall. (Old habits die hard when emotions are tried.)

Kelli, you discovered the pregnancy at Thanksgiving? Why not Sweet Potato instead of Sweet Pea?

Misfit, indeed some things are meant to be. How can you be upset about a pregnancy happening under those circumstances? I'm sorry to hear about your miscarriage, though. That would be such a huge surprise, to not know like that.

[WILLIAM]

A sure fire way to be/get pregnant is by not expecting it and drinking large quantities of alcohol. We declared in May of '03 that we would party all summer and then try. Sure enough June comes around and she is pregnant. There is still some guilt with the partying that occurred before we found out. Good luck to you.

[cat]

Ooooh, the pregnancy test... Watch out mrtl, it's a slippery slope you tread!! I am telling you, those suckers get EXPENSIVE! (Me? Obsessive? Nah!)

I have never had those chips, but damned if I don't want to rush right out and get me some! But that's the PMS talkin'...

[Circus Kelli]

mrtl -- There was no Sweet Potatoes on the table. Just some turkey, gravy and rhudebega (sp). Sweet Rhudebega (besides knowing how to spell it) doesn't roll off the tongue like Sweet Pea does. :) While I was preggers, her nickname was "Belly Bean."

[krankipantzen]

Um, did you know that some antibiotics can reduce the effectiveness of birth control pills? We will all be waiting on the edge of our seats over the next couple weeks. Stress...pregnancy....PMS...we shall see.

[POKEY]

You are welcome to THIS whenever you're ready.

[mrtl]

William, don't be bringin' yo bad hittin-up mojo 'round hea. Anyway, I've decided to be a Very Good Girl... at least until Danielle gets a hold of me, takes me bar hopping in Anchorage and makes me sleep with the sounds of fake orgasms next door. Other than that I'll be Very Good. (Note to self: Tell Danielle no dance joints. She doesn't want to see drunk mrtl dancing. Really.)

Cat, I've lost count of how many I've taken since Bug arrived. It's pathetic.

Kelli, Belly Bean is so cute, but I may have to stop talking to you now. How could you possibly have Thanksgiving without sweet potatoes, peeled, cut up and cooked in a lake of butter and brown sugar in an iron skillet till they melt in your mouth? HOW? Dammit. I'll be home with my mother, whose middle name is "Stick-o-Butter," and I'm sure she'll make them... must. resist. craving.

Kranki, nice public service announcement, thank you! I'll have to read the little pamphlet that came with these drugs.

Pokey, Misty of Chincoteague is calling you. Go hop into her book.

[AndreaBT]

I am obsessive about pregnancy tests. I have never peed on a stick without at least secretly hoping it was positive, even if we weren't trying at the time. I've had many many negatives, and many many positives (because of my miscarriages). I should buy stock in pregnancy tests. I could tell you which ones are most accurate, which ones you can test early with, that kind of thing. And I've had tests that I've ripped apart and looked cross-eyed at to see if there was the faintest imaginary second pink line (sometimes there was).

OH, I am definitely OCD about pregnancy tests.